Untuk yang merasa tersakiti karena menyakiti,

Jangan pernah sembunyi dan mengumpat mereka.
Karena jika kamu begitu,
kamu pecundang.

Jika mereka menyebutmu trouble-maker, jangan marah. Itu tandanya mereka perhatian.

Jika hati mereka tersakiti karenamu, kamu  harusnya sadar. Itu tandanya mereka punya hati, sama sepertimu.

Jika air mata mereka keluar karena kejengkelan mereka, dengarkanlah mereka. Itu tandanya mereka sudah terlalu lama menahan perasaan mereka.

Jika suara mereka bergetar ketika membicarakan namamu,  tanya apa yang mereka mau. Itu tandanya bagi mereka menyebutkan namamu sama saja menyakiti hati mereka.

Jika amarah mereka sudah terlalu banyak hingga tidak bisa keluar, mengertilah. Itu tandanya mereka masih bisa mengontrol emosi mereka, agar hatimu tidak juga tersakiti.

Dan jika mereka marah,
percayalah mereka masih sayang kamu.


Ketika hatimu robek, sakit, haruskah kamu berbalik dan membalas dendam?
Ketika harapan terbesarmu buyar karena hal yang tidak kamu mengerti, haruskah kamu berbalik dan marah?
Ketika semua hal baik dihadapanmu menghilang, haruskah kamu berbalik dan berteriak agar semua terang?
Ketika kenyataan berbanding terbalik dengan mimpimu, haruskah kamu berbalik dan mengurung dan menyiksa dirimu?
dan ketika semua rencanamu terganti oleh hal-hal yang kamu tidak suka, haruskah kamu berbalik dan menyakiti orang-orang disekitarmu?

Tidak. sama. sekali.

Tanyakan pada dirimu,
apakah kamu ingin menjadi jahat dengan membalas dendam?
apakah kamu mau menghabiskan tenagamu dengan marah?
apakah dengan berteriak dunia akan mendengarkan?
apakah ada keuntungan dari mengurung dan menyiksa diri?
apakah kamu tega menyakiti orang-orang disekitarmu?

kalau jawabanmu ya,
kamu pecundang.

If you ask me who is the best man in the whole world, my answer will be always my dad. Bapak. Some people thinks that calling a father with 'bapak' doesn't sound great. I mean, they think that it is too old-fashioned or ndeso maybe. But a big no. I really am proud calling my dad 'bapak'. I know that I'm gonna marry a man someday, but my dad is always be the best man I have ever known.
And this post is dedicated to you, my hero :)

My dad was born in December 24th 1965 (count  his age by yourself) in Cilacap, a small town in Central Java, Indonesia. His dad aka Opa is working in a textile company and was assigned in Cilacap. Opa has ever stayed in Pematang Siantar (where he met Oma:')) then he moved to Cilacap when he was just married. Okay, back to my dad. Dad spent like 2 years in Cilacap and moved to Semarang. And I can say Semarang is my dad's hometown (although Opa adalah orang Madura yang besar di Jakarta dan Oma adalah orang Padang asli) because he grew up in here. Opa's job was promised a happy life, I mean my dad's childhood wasn't really hard. He graduated from high school in 1984.

The journey started in college.

My dad decided to go to Jogja to continue his study because he wanted to take mining engineering at Universitas Pembangunan Nasional. In Jogja all the miracles happened. My dad was my mom's neighbour. My mom was going to Universitas Gadjah Mada (which makes me jealous of her every single time). They were dating for like 7 or  8 years (which makes me jealous again, because you know? My dad is my mom's first boyfriend!) and now have married happily for 19 years.
My dad finished his college in 1992, which means that he went to college for like 8 years o__O (i heard mining engineering was hard) then he got a job in a state-owned coal mining company and assigned in a really really small town in the deep South Sumatera, Tanjung Enim (google it!). His salary wasn't too much but he didn't give up. He married my mom in 1994 in Malang (my mom's imaginary wedding was happened :')) and took my mom to live in Tanjung Enim.

My dad got his little hero in 1995. Khanza Farrasafif Muhammad. First son, first kid, and  it was really easy to make Mas Ancha became his everything. But Allah loves mas ancha too much, and took him just when mas ancha is one month old. My dad's world became really dark, he cried in mas ancha's funeral (and it just really hurts knowing him cried because he's really strong. And if he cried, that means he couldn't hold the pain anymore). Just like a month after mas ancha's funeral, my dad got like a scholarship from the company to have a course in Sydney for three months. He didn't pay at all. Totally free!

After came back from Sydney, my dad's life was getting better. He got promotion and ME! YES ME! I CAME TO HIS LIFE IN 1997. He was really happy, mom was really happy, and all the family were happy because I could cheer my parents up.
Then, Bapak became my everything. He taught me everything like seriously everything! 'Bapak' was my first word you know?:') Dad introduced me English and taught me to read when I was two years old (I could read a short story when I was 3 :p). He taught me to play football, to draw, to write, and protected me no matter what. The stroy of three musketeers end in 2001 because my little annoying sister, Aqilla Khairani Shafira was born. Lol I love her, kok! My parents love us very much and they NEVER call us with 'kamu'. They always call us mbak and adek. Me and my sister think 'kamu' in our family is a rude word. You may call us weird but I seriously don't care.


He's my doctor.

Have I told you that I have ever swallowed a ring? Lol, but I'm not joking. I have ever have a ring that happily stuck in my throat. And he made that ring out by making me vomited. There were three blood vomits. I didn't cry, my mom did! I was 5 at that time.


His dark world back again...

His beloved woman, his mama, my Oma, passed away in 18th of June 2003. My birthday? Yes:") Oma was a reaaaaallllyyyyy nice person. You will love her at the first sight. She's incredible... My dad didn't cried at the funeral, and 6 years of me was asking "Kok bapak mamanya meninggal nggak nangis? Yang nangis malah ibu.." he answered me, "Buat apa nangis, nggak akan bawa Oma kembali. Yang penting doanya mbak." He smiled and kissed my head.

He is such a strong human being. He didn't give up and kept doing his daily activity normally.

He got scholarship again in Lebaran 2003. This time, to Japan. For a month. He went to Tokyo, Kyoto, and Osaka. He sent us postcards and told us Shinkansen was really nice. AAAAHH shinkansen... I really am proud of him. Jealous? Maybe yes, but he always tells me that I HAVE TO be better than him. How to be better than him when he's already the best?

He never bring me down.

He got scholarship again in 2008 for 10 months and mom always says "kenapa bapak dapet ke luar negerinya belajar mulu.." Lol. Guess where did my dad go? FRANCE!!! Like seriously, France!! He stayed in Fontainebleau, a town that located 60km from Paris. YES. PARIS. He went to Paris every weekend... and saw Eiffel Tower, and Arc De Triomphe, and Lafayette and Gare de Lyon... And I asked him in a crazy way "How's Paris? How's Eiffel Tower? Bapak naik ke atas gak? AAAA Eiffel!!" And he answered "Biasa aja ah, masih ngangenin Ka'bah tau mbaaa" And it made me think. Seriously.
Not only France, he got a chance to had a study tour to Germany,Luxemburg,Norway,Sweden and felt SNOW!!! OMG SEEING SNOW IS ONE OF MY BIGGEST DREAMS EVER. He said snow was extremely nice..

I told you.

I didn't love him because he has ever travelled around Europe. Not because he's an engineer.

I love him because he loves me. Because he protects me. Because he makes me feel special. I love him for him, not for his look, his job, his experiences. Maybe he didn't know... But bapak, you gotta know that I love you sooooo much{}

Sorry if there are grammatical mistakes, yeah English isn't my main language.

Ketika semua hal berubah menjadi abu-abu, aku cuma butuh kamu, dan semua warna yang kamu punya...

Jika kamu mempunyai satu buah apel, makanlah.
Dan jika kamu punya dua, tawari aku.
Aku tidak akan menerima,
namun aku akan bahagia karena kamu menganggap aku ada.

Jika kamu melihat awan putih yang berarak bebas, tersenyumlah.
Dan jika kamu melihat pelangi, menyanyilah bersamaku.
Aku tidak akan bilang kamu gila,
namun aku akan bahagia karena kamu bahagia bersamaku.

Jika kamu mendengar kicau burung, pejamkan matamu.
Dan jika kamu mendengar simfoni, mari menari bersamaku.
Aku tidak akan menghina,
namun aku akan bahagia karena kamu dan aku menjadi aneh bersama.

Doamu adalah senyumku hari itu.
Dan saat kamu tertawa bersamaku, tidak ada yang lebih indah dari ini.

Kita tidak saling bertemu,
namun aku ingin percaya bahwa kamu dan aku sama-sama berharap begitu.

Kita tidak saling menatap,
namun aku ingin percaya bahwa kamu dan aku sama-sama bahagia.

dan Kita juga tidak saling bicara,
tapi aku ingin percaya bahwa kamu dan aku sama-sama saling mendoakan...

dan tolong, jangan pernah keluarkan air matamu karenaku,
kecuali kamu merasa bahagia dan bangga.
Aku cinta kamu, ibu:*

Kamu selalu saja berada disini, di dalam tulang tengkorak kepalaku. Kamu juga tidak mau pergi dari sini, dari saraf-saraf sensitif otakku. Kamu nggak bakalan pergi lama dari sini. Mungkin pada beberapa waktu otakku mau berbaik hati dengan memberikanku sedikit jeda waktu untuk melupakanmu. Namun kamu tidak pernah benar-benar pergi,

Post terakhir saya kapan? HAH? 5 Desember? Iyuwhhhh, jadul banget. Sekarang udah 2013, man!
2013 harus banyak yang berubah. Yang jelek semoga cepet ilang, dan yang baik-baik tetep ada ya. Oh iya, buat kamu-kamu yang geer namanya bakalan ditulis di blog saya, jangan berkhayal. Kalian harus membayar lebih untuk itu. Haha pis pipis, kidding! ^^

Kalian tau sekarang saya lagi apa? Buat yang kepengen tau banget alias kepo, saya sekarang lagi malem kamis-an di balkon atas sambil minum hot chocolate dan makan biskuit bayi bareng someone :3 Buat yang masihhh aja kepo (kepo is good, btw), Ya, dia bukan pacar saya. Bukan, dia bukan cowok. Dan ya, dia sepupu saya.___.

Oke, serius yuk. Sekarang kan udah 2013, teman. Nah, pasti kalian punya revolusi tahun baru kan. Masih aja nggak punya? Masih aja nggak bisa move on? Cupu deh. *digebukin massa*
2013 dianggap orang banyak spesial, karena mereka semua yang percaya sama kejadian di tanggal 21 desember 2012 itu masih nggak percaya mereka masih eksis di dunia. Saya sendiri juga masih nggak percaya bisa ngelewatin tanggal 21 Desember 2012 itu dengan sukses (baca: markarasta). Oh iya, anak alay yang foto dari pojok kanan atas juga masih bersikukuh menganggap diri mereka keren, dan kamu eh saya eh kamu masih nggak percaya kalo kamu masih belom bisa move on. HAHAHA galau? kasian deh. Taun baru, semangat baru, neng! Jadi lebih dewasa, lebih alay, dan lebih eksis!;) -_______-

Selum cokelat panas saya berubah menjadi es teh, dan sebelum biskuit bayi nya berubah jadi bubur ayam, saya akan mencoba menyelesaikan postingan ini kawan:"))) *kedipkedipmanja* *layarlaptoppecah*

Hm, 2013 ya. Saya akan membagi sedikit cerita ya. Kan saya sudah kurang lebih 6 bulan pisah dari bapak sama ibu. There are much bad and good things, ya know? I'll try to write some of them.
The bad ones:

1. Jauh dari ibu. Sumpah ini yang paling paling paling paling berat. Kalo aja kalian tau gimana deketnya saya sama ibu dan tiba-tiba harus pisah. Hiks.
2. Jauh dari bapak. Ini juga berat, kawan. Saya nggak punya guru private lagi sekarang.
3. Jauh dari AQILL!!! Walaupun adek saya ini bawel, ngambekan, suka marah-marah, jelek, item, gila, TAPI SAYA SAYANG DIAAAAA!
4. Jauh dari temen-temen SMP saya. Yah, walaupun saya nggak pindah ke Malang, I know there's gonna be time when we gotta to be separated:')
5. Jauh dari seafood!! I love crab more than you can imagine. I could eat two crabs!! Lols kepiting saos tiram, I miss you much:*